I Want To Set Myself on Fire and Slit My Own Throat

No, thats only a metaphor for my thoughts on the year respectively.
Perhaps, im just rather depressed around the holidays.
When in reality its my independence kicking in and that only reminds me of my dependence on my friends.
I miss my friends.
I honestly do.
And while im too busy complaining and being a fucking miser, i cant commit to anything.
Not finishing anything today, for the record. Perhaps for the rest of the year.

When valentines day comes around, i'll bring back a few projects i had going for me.
I should really get working, a brigade is working through, and its a perfect fit.

turn back around and get out of
the sandbox and the simplest
manners of reaction
to the simplest smallest actions because
last nights effects on meare inversely proportioned
to the year of 2006
and how time is a circle
and how the walls are closing in
and how time is just a circle
a circle
not a click.

ripped my knees on the ground
as the mistress had an orgasm we
didn't expect everyone to see
how i've been hung on curtains
let's pretend:
"i'm a foolish sailor, and every thing i look at
turns into water
so i never get on shore"
but then again:
"i'm a foolish half-man
im not here to stare but
i need a drink of water
I've just landed upon the shore"

don't, go,
looking around here for something
you know is wrong you know is gone
and yet again it was the night before
she left it here, for him (once more)
he's looking around here for it
you know it's wrong you know it's gone
just again like the night before
he left it here, for her (no more)